I’d like to formally announce that I too could potentially have cause to assert a paternity claim to the baby of Anne Nicole. Please let it be known here that I will have my legal counsel draw up a motion in the very near future. Said motion will detail my intent to challenge the claims of all of these other false interlopers intent only on getting their grubby hands on the money Anna Nicole rightfully earned by sleeping with an old wrinkled guy many many years ago. Additionally, said claim will detail the potential events immediately leading up to and including the possible whirlwind affair which may have resulted in the lustful, but loving, conception of the child. Any media outlet and/or journalist wishing to contact me for interviews should just drop me an email as I’m currently residing in The Presidential Suite on the penthouse level of the Little Rock Holiday Inn and don’t use telephones. Also, please know that my family members, life-long friends, acquaintances, as well as the high school kid at the local mcdonald’s drive-thu are all a) prepared to testify on behalf of my claim and b) readily agree to make appearances on all of the talk and news shows.

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