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So, I’m wondering…how many times in one day can a child yell out –
“Trick or Treat.  Smell my feet.  Give me something good to eat.”


Yes.  It is possible…


“The most effective parents have split-personalities. They are tough and kind at the same time. Which means, only by feeling both loved as well as barely tolerated will kids learn they must leave the house in order to become contributing members of society.

Besides, having psycho parents gives the kid(s) a head-start on learning how to deal with all of the other psycho people in the world…”

A recent conversation at the dinner table…

One of The LilOnes – “Daddy?”
Me – “Yes?”
One of The LilOnes – “You’re not a good daddy.”
Me – “Is that so?”
One of The LilOnes – “Yes. You’re not a good daddy.”
Me – “Well, I’ll tell you what. While I’m practicing and trying to become a better dad, you can stand in the corner.”
One of The LilOnes – “Daddy, I changed my mind. You are a pretty good daddy.”
Me – “I had a feelng you might say that.”

(just molding young minds here…)

Not to be outdone, but LilOne#2 heard the below exchange…and subsequent giggles and guffaws…waited for a break in the action and announced she wanted a Spanish Muffin.

The giggles and guffaws started up again in earnest.

I recently introduced the Lil’ Ones to English Muffins.

Lightly toasted…slathered with Strawberry Jam…there’s nothing better, in my opinion.
Also, it’s a lot of fun to say “English Muffin” and “Strawburry” while mimicking the English accent.

The Lil Ones dig it.

So, today, LilOne#1 saw me eating one and then asked if she too could have a “Language Muffin”.

Makes perfect sense right?

BetterHalf found this in the mailbox yesterday:

We’re not sure when or how it was placed there.  But, the LilOnes are pretty resourceful it seems…especially with regard to Christmas.

Now, the letter writing has been fairly constant and prolific thus far.  I have seen at least five letters being written.  So, I’m not too surprised one made it to the mailbox.  But, the “address” gave me a chuckle.  And, that it was sealed and stamped was hilarious.

There was no prompting by the parents for any of it.

And, based on what I have been able to determine, this particular letter to “Santa Clos” is the one requesting a ceiling fan for her room.

I have no idea how I’m going to make this work out correctly…

…Yellow Man in Timbuktu…

The LilOnes are fans of The Spice Girls, especially the “Spice Up Your Life” song.

And, they find the word, “Timbuktu“, to be REALLY REALLY funny.

Seriously…they howl with laughter whenever they hear the word.

I have tried to explain to them that a) it’s not a politically correct phrase and b) the people in Timbuktu are not yellow…but it’s no use…

Recent events at Chez Jamoker’…

LilOne#1 saying – “This jacket makes me look ugly.”

(she is NOT old enough to be worried about how she looks)

LilOne#2 saying – “I’d like to have some privacy, please.”

(she is NOT old enough to even understand what ‘privacy’ means.)

LilOne#2 recently put an entire roll of toilet paper in the toilet.

(what a pain in my a$$)

LilOne#1 got extremely upset when dear old Jamoker dad cheated in a race and beat her.

(need to help develop a little intestinal fortitude with that one…and, for the record, I had let her win all the races up to that point)

And, both LilOnes always want me to read ‘just one more book’ at bedtime.

Every day is an adventure…

LilOne#1 says – “Daddy, I’m ready to go to the Burritum.”

LilOne#2 says – “Yeah! We’re goin’ to the Burritum.”

BetterHalf says – “Girls, it is the AR-Boretum.”

LilOne#1 – “AR-Burritum.”

LilOne#2 – “Burritum.”

LilOne#1 – “It’s not Burritum. It’s AR-Burritum.”

LilOne#2 – “AR-Burritum.”

Jamoker Says – “Let’s get some Yummy Yummy Burritos!!”

LilOne#1 – “Daddy are you making a joke?”

Jamoker – “Yes, honey…but, it’ll be years before you get it.”

July 2019
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